Thursday, January 26, 2006

The Birds Console Me

After consuming the homunculus, I have garnered respect from the neighbourhood birds at last. At 2pm I ventured outdoors to bury some soiled catalogues, and saw that a great multitude of sparrows and gulls had amassed on the lawn.

I took this as an omen of good fortune in light of my recent unpleasantnesses, and celebrated by removing my shoes and enjoying the breeze generated by their beating wings as it wafted against my soles.

The birds then took it in turns to expertly suckle at my toes, which surely offered them scant nourishment, but which soothed me greatly. Each tweet from each beak seemed to declare me Monarch of their race.
I feel now that they expect me to offer them sanctuary and to bestow upon them favours, but I will be a hard King, and will rule with an iron fist.


The Birds said...


Horton Carew said...

Do not attempt to curry favour with me, birds, for I am immune to your bribes.