Monday, January 30, 2006

A Siege

I have stayed in my room all day, not daring to confront the malevolent being who has assumed the form of Uncle Joe. At times he calls to me from outside the door, always the same refrain: "Come out Horton, come out Horton". At other moments I see his face hovering at my window, with that chilling fixed smile curling his lips. I feel intuitively that, should he wish to, he could easily breach the rudimentary barricade I have created by the door, but that he is choosing instead to toy with me for his own pleasure.

Luckily, I have a small stock of dry-roasted peanuts in my room and a tube of Athlete's Foot cream: combined, these have provided me a tolerable sustenance, but I will need to obtain more nourishing victuals soon if I am to survive.

Images of chocolate eclairs, pickled eggs, and American candies plague my thoughts, arising either through simple delirium from hunger, or placed there telepathically by he who wishes me harm. This electronic diary of mine provides a welcome distraction to my gnawing cravings. Only this and Ebay.com - today I have bought a Gremlins 2 collectable thermos, and a signed copy of Alan Titchmarsh's latest novel.

Maybe these will cheer me if I live long enough to enjoy them. The cry of "Come out Horton, come out Horton" chills me anew.

2 comments:

Uncle Joe said...

Come out Horton, come out Horton
Come out Horton, come out Horton
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Horton Carew said...

So you are in the matrix Uncle Joe? Alas, I am doomed.