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About Me
- HORTON CAREW
- Dundee, Scotland, United Kingdom
- I was born in a hovel in Dundee, the product of a union between a syphilitic scullion and a prominent biscuit maker. I went to school several times, and know some facts.
PREVIOUS ADVENTURES
- The FIRST ENTRY and consequent adventure involving seagulls and Uncle Ben
- A visit from Drs Flitey and Gland
- A bee theory and new punctuation
- A dalliance with immortality
- I become a published poet
- Ghosts and a grail quest
- A lengthy adventure wherein I am plagued by ants and Patrick Bossert (schoolboy cubemaster)
- I become a writer and theatre critic
- A terrifying adventure wherein my dead mother manifests and I become dreadfully evil
- I am interviewed by a postgraduate (good pictures of monkeys included)
- I become an artist, accidentally impregnate my art tutor, fall in love, then become incarcerated
- I formulate a plan to escape my grim asylum (I eventually succeed)
Blog Archive
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2006
(148)
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February
(23)
- Buzzing
- Bee Curd
- Notes on the Bee
- A Fortuitous Discovery
- Absence of Bees
- Bee Searching
- A Bee Theory
- Yesterday's Visit Described
- Anxious to Impress
- Anticipating Scholars
- Saint Valentine's Day
- Shopping
- Preparing For Guests
- A Day Given Over to Idleness
- Respite
- .... . / .... ._ ... / _ _ . ... . _. _.. / .......
- Uncle Ben Departs
- again I am fine
- a further up-date to calm my readers
- The Grimmest of Updates
- a further message from HORTON
- A Curious Thermos
- Recuperating with Uncle Ben
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February
(23)
Some other electronic diaries which might reward an idle browse one afternoon.
- Professor Jessica Flitey - she is writing a monograph about me
- Dr. Stu - the musings of a Computing lecturer - as exciting as it sounds!
- Wilf's World - the enthusiastic thoughts of a canny youngster
- Peep This Diary - three 17th Century gentlemen somehow have access to the internet
- The Space Blog of Alfie Haggis - Mr Haggis needs your help
- Groanin' Jock - the groanin's (groanings) of the eponymous Jock (Scot)
- The Germaine Truth - strange goings on in Oregon
6 comments:
Horton me old chum, glad to hear things are well in Dundee and that your time spent in Leith has allowed you to recover your wits. We must get together for a pint of mayonnaise and a game of tiddleywinks next time I'm up.
Ah, Dr. Kerrigan? Of the University of Leicester? Your research on hips is well-known to me. As a computer whizz, perhaps you could tell me how I might rid my Labiatae! computer of this "Labiatae" virus that I seem to have picked up! (see earlier comments)
Labiatae!
We are unable to contact Horton at the moment - I had no idea you knew him!
Coincidentally, I am also aware of Dr. Kerrigan's work, but am more familiar with his 'unofficial' publications.
Dr. Kerrigan, we move in the same circles, you and I. I believe we met at the Tingfang Conference in Harrogate, where I greatly enjoyed your paper "Digital Demonology: Raising Devils Through MSN".
What is your involvement with the Carew case may I ask? Are you genuinely a personal friend of Mr. Carew?
Horton and I are old chums from the Tiddleywinks Society at the Railway Station club on the Hawkhill.
More than that I am not at liberty to divulge for the sake of Horton's privacy.
Can't you academics leave the poor man in peace?
Dr Gland - I suggest buying a copy of Norton's Anti-Virus (Hellfire edition, not Professional or Student edition). In addition to this apply ginseng and mandrake to the DVD before inserting it into the caddy to install. Instead of watching the installation bar I suggest wearing some curtains and dancing around your computer chanting, "Eataibal! Eataibal! Eataibal!" until installation is successful.
Dr. Kerrigan, I confess that I am disappointed in you. You are a man of science and logic! To entertain such Labiatae! 'mystic' tomfoolery is ludicrous. You have lost my respect.
Dr. Gland, you have betrayed your ignorance once again. Yes, Dr. Kerrigan embraces the doctrines of science and empiricism, but he is also open to the world of the supernatural. This is admirable.
Norton Antivirus (Hellfire Edition) is not widely available outside specialist circles. I will happily lend you a copy.
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